OJ Arrested for Robbery! Hidden Tapes Revealed!
(This blog was originally written and posted by Jolly Judd AKA: me, on my old Myspace profile on 9/17/2007)
In case you didn’t hear, O.J. Simpson was arrested for armed robbery last weekend when he and some of his friends broke into a hotel room to retrieve some sports memorabilia that had had been previously taken from him. Just now, on MSNBC, they revealed that there was actually an audio tape recording what had been said inside the hotel room when this happened (this is true, it’s the main story on the news right now). Just in case you haven’t seen it yet, I thought I would write down what I remember of this recorded transcript. It’s so funny that it doesn’t even require me making anything up. here we go!
Transcript of OJ Simpson Recording:
OJ Simpson: Get down on the motherfucking ground right now! Seal the doors! Don’t let any of these motherfuckers out of here!
unknown voice: I don’t know what you’re talking about OJ, we didn’t take anything from you
OJ: What, you think you can take shit from me!!! huh motherfucker!!!!!
Unknown: No man, we didn’t do anything!
Another Unknown Voice: Damn, put those guns away, we didn’t take SHIT!
OJ: You motherfuckers think you can take shit from me? huh? Answer me motherfuckers!
Unknown: Look man, leave us alone, I’m sorry man!
OJ: Sorry? Nigga I’m the motherfucking JUICE! I’ll fucking KILL YOU!
unknown: Look I’m fucking sorry man! Take the shit, please!!!
OJ: Bitch…..I’m the fucking JUICE. I’ll cut you up motherfucker!!!!
unknown: Stop…..just take the shit man!!! I’m fuckin sorry!
OJ: Alright let’s slice these motherfuckers up! Where are my fucking black leather gloves? Get the fucking Bronco and park it out front…..NOW!
Disclaimer: I guess I should mention this just in case I get brought up on charges of defamation from Mr. Simpson. The second half of the transcript was made up by me entirely. Although I will say that OJ sounded quite menacing on the tape and reporters on tv were saying: “well what do you expect to hear from a murderer like him”. This was merely my interpretation of what I thought he might as well be saying in the hotel room.
Tags: Adult-humor, comedy, funny news, OJ arrested, OJ robbery, OJ Simpson, satire, the juice
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